Choosing what to spend my emotional resources on

An interesting tidbit about Enneagram type fives is that they carefully calculate how to spend their energy and that plays a role in their conflict style.  Sometimes an Enneagram five will decide they don't want to spend their energy on the other person's reaction.  This isn't about keeping the peace like it can be for other types.  It's about deciding what I want to spend my energy on and so when I decide something is not worth my energy, I let it go.  I both don't spend the energy bringing it up to the other person AND I don't spend the energy being mad about it or holding on to any form of resentment.

I think I did that a lot in my marriage.  That's not to say there weren't plenty of times I tried to bring up issues but there also were plenty of times I let go of issues that in hindsight maybe I should have brought up.  Does that make me avoidant?  Maybe?