My biggest strength in my marriage was acceptance, maybe you could even call it radical acceptance. I communicated my issues to my now ex-husband and then I let go. I don't waste energy on resentment, offense, grudges, etc. In the case of my marriage, it allowed me to find peace even in the middle of toxicity. It gave me space to focus on the positive. It left me relatively happy (although I'm now learning the degrees of happiness).
My biggest weakness in my marriage was that same radical acceptance. I tolerated behavior I should have walked away from. I taught my ex-husband that it was okay to mistreat me, neglect me, ignore me. (I can take accountability for that without diminishing his very real choice to take advantage of this weakness of mine. My tolerance does not make his behavior acceptable.)
When I put it in those terms, it's hard to regret my actions. But I hope I am learning how to balance this strength so that I recognize more quickly when I am being taken advantage of. I don't ever want to get to a place where I accept resentment, offense, grudges, etc. I just want to be better about choosing to walk away when I'm being mistreated or taken advantage of.
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