The lows that follow the highs

It's weird how it is all extremes, nothing in the middle.  When I respond that I'm "okay", it's not because I'm actually just okay.  It's because I'm trying to balance in my head the extreme feelings that have washed over me in the last few hours.  One moment I'm walking on water because I've made some great connections, done something really empowering, focused on me and something that feeds my happiness, etc.  The next I'm lost, alone, scared, sad, angry, maybe even on the floor crying in my grief and pain.

So right now I sit feeling so very alone and lost.  All the wind of the day (and the amazing experience I had at a women's retreat) has left my sail.  My eyes want to close.  I can't focus.  I tried an audiobook.  I tried writing.  I even tried watching a mindless show.  But my mind keeps wandering.