I feel like a couple people that don't really know my relationship or husband have said some things to commiserate and emphasize that are putting me back in my head. They are people who have seen or experienced divorce firsthand and I think are interpreting what I have shared through their own lenses. And with my so many of own questions swirling through my head, I'm finding it hard to separate what I know and believe with what other people think.
I ran one of those ideas planted in my head by others past my mom last night. She knows my husband quite well and she has had quite a few glimpses into our relationship over the years. It was comforting to hear her speak out loud what my heart and gut were telling me.
But that initial seed of doubt planted by others still sits there. And it serves no purpose other than to make me crazy and keep me awake at night. How do I get past this unproductive rumination? How do I avoid this influence in the future?
I guess this is the con of your support network becoming those who have been divorced before. They are the ones who are most able to empathize with you but they are also the ones most likely to project their own experiences on yours.
What I really need right now is just someone who will sit with me while I cry. I've done enough analyzing and trying to figure out why, probably way too much. I need to get out of my head. Right now, I just need to grieve. I just need to feel not so alone as the pain washes through me.
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