I got married right out of college. I never lived on my own until now. So I learned to navigate adulthood with a partner. When that is the way you learn to navigate adulthood, you naturally lean on each other's strengths. So there are some things you primarily handle and some things they primarily handle.
In my case, my ex-husband handled everything car related. And that became even more unbalanced in the last decade when I was not regularly commuting by car. Although I rode with him often enough when we traveled or went out to the suburbs, I very rarely drove on my own since about 2012.
So being suddenly handed over all the responsibility for my car this year has been incredibly intimidating. And it doesn't help that we switched to EVs this year so my car doesn't really resemble at all the car I owned the last time I had a daily commute by car (in 2012 - I think it was a VW Beetle Convertible - I don't remember if the diesel or the turbo gas engine was the last one I had when I was regularly commuting).
What I feared most was that first trip through the car wash and so I put it off and put it off until I couldn't anymore because my car was covered in salt after a trip to the north. To maneuver the wheel onto the track, then get it in neutral, then switch to the service menu to find the car wash mode button, and then fold the mirrors all before the car entered the wash seemed like a monumental task.
So today I found a car wash near my hotel and it went so seamlessly that there were tears in my eyes as windows were covered with soap. It was one of those moments (and I've had plenty these past months) where I felt so empowered and ready to face anything. If I can do the thing that most intimidates me with my car, I probably can figure the rest of life out.
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